jstjames 03

[jaxsons]

Sorry about last night.

Heard someone broke the last egg, but I made some flax eggs if anyone wants the protein or wants to bake.

RONEN.

Can I talk to you about something? It's [.....] not unrelated to what apparently happened last night.

TEAM KAMCHATKA.

T-minus 48 hours. Make sure you've got stuff packed for an overnight, and remember to dress up: Russia's cold in February, thought it shouldn't be too bad on the coast.

Can y'all take inventory of everything you find on site? Lynfield and Weber, you take point on viable medical equipment and supplies. I'll see you in the C1 hangar at 8am, UTC+12 local time.

( ooc: this post will have talk of PTSD - you're forewarned!)

Comments

Kix

[jaxsons]

I was talking to Adri about wanting more in general, and he asked me if there's anyone I'd consider that more with. Jamie popped into my mind first, but I didn't do anything about it. I kept thinking about it.

Then Xitang happened. It was already all high emotions. I asked to stay over one night after, which hadn't happened a lot in the past, and it felt [....] real nice to snuggle in and feel so safe. Nicer than I was expecting. Then with my birthday, I kept thinking about him and my conversation with Adri, and honestly if Jamie hadn't come to me kissed me first, I would've tried to shove it down for longer. So it's been an accumulation of a lot of feelings, but it's always been so easy with J, so maybe that's why the transition was, too.

Kix

[andcaboodle]

Right. I get it. He's got a way of making you feel safe and taken care of and it is nice to sl and that's a lovely feeling. You're lucky How fortunate that he made a move, then

Kix

[jaxsons]

Yeah. It's been real nice, except when I wake him up from my nightmares and night terrors. I feel like shit.

Kix

[andcaboodle]

Hopefully that doesn't happen too often because he deserves a good sleep

Kix

[jaxsons]

I don't disagree, but I don't have that much control over it, Kit. Now I have to ask my ex to see me as a patient.

Kix

[andcaboodle]

I wasn't blaming you; I know it's not your fault. But I also know how Jamie gets when he's concerned about one of the people he cares deeply for.

I'm not saying it won't be awkward or uncomfortable but he is a professional and you broke up a few years ago; I hope the help that therapy provides ultimately outweighs the discomfort. You shouldn't be having nightmares like that often for your sake either.

Kix

[jaxsons]

I know how he gets too, and if I thought I could convince him he doesn't need to fuss, I'd push harder, but this is Jamie. I'm not going to drag him down with me. If I notice he isn't sleeping, I'll put my foot down and deal with the consequences.

I guess we'll see. He hasn't even responded to me yet.

Kix

[andcaboodle]

[...]

There's a lot going on. Maybe he just hasn't seen it yet

Kix

[jaxsons]

Probably. I'm nervous to talk to him, anyway.

Kix

[andcaboodle]

I'm sure it will be okay. I can't imagine him saying no

Kix

[jaxsons]

It's not about him saying no. He was tripping over himself to do my psych eval for volunteering myself, even after I asked if he'd recuse himself because I knew he wouldn't be impartial. We can't do that anymore, but I also can't [....] make any more excuses about avoiding him.