nnovak ‖ 001

[oneirophrenic]

It seems that it is once again time for a periodic reminder of what behavior is acceptable where. Congratulations, everyone: it has been eight (8) months since my last post on this topic. A new record! However, let us not rest on our laurels, as I have recently borne witness to some of the most horrifying behavior yet.

Acceptable Library Behavior:
› Reading
› Quiet contemplation
› Listening to music
    › This insistence on Philip Glass over, say, Chopin continues to grate, but that is a topic for another time.
› Studying without narrating your thoughts aloud

Unacceptable Library Behavior:
› Eating fragrant foods
› Making out like a pair of schoolchildren
› Loudly humming to the aforementioned classical music, and in the wrong key
› Clipping your toenails ‼️

You may be asking yourselves: "Niko, surely no one is clipping their toenails in the library. Why even add that?" I regret to inform you that I saw it with my own eyes (I will not name names), and that it is the worst thing I have personally witnessed since Shaq's album release party in 1993. (Did you know Shaq released an album? Now you do.)

It is a small ship. Let us try to be kind to one another! And, if at all possible, spare each other such unpleasant sights.

Comments

[loculus]

Now this is a violence against too many of us.

[jaxsons]

Have you ever felt older in your life?

[loculus]

I tried to scroll away and threw out my back.

[jaxsons]

I'll lend you my walker. I'm gonna roll it down the hall.

[loculus]

I'm worried that scrambling after it will loosen my dentures.

[jaxsons]

I'll roll it slow. Can't push that hard anymore after all that osteoporosis.

[delilahs]

is it not a real school? it's not the show he was on, is it?

[loculus]

No. And no, although he would have turned heads as Todd back in the day.

[delilahs]

what's todd's vibe

[loculus]

Tall, dark-haired, and alarmingly handsome. Please don't quiz me about anything else, this was decades ago. He played [...] at least one sport.

[delilahs]

okay yeah I see the vision

I'm politely refraining from asking how many decades ago

[loculus]

Eight.